SPOILER ALERT! NASA Squashes Rumors of Impending Announcement of Major Discovery on Mars

The capitalist news media has been pushing rumors that NASA was about to hold a news conference announcing that a major discovery has recently been made on the Red Planet by the Mars Science Laboratory (a.k.a. “Curiosity”).

This rumor-mongering was started, inadvertently, by Dr. John Grotzinger of Caltech, who made some intriguing allusions to big news coming out of the MSL program just in time for X-mas during a NASA teleconference a few weeks ago.

Today, NASA published a press release downplaying the rumors, which were beginning to focus on an upcoming news conference to be presented by MSL scientists at the fall meeting of the American Geophysical Union, which will be held in San Francisco on December 3rd.

Today’s NASA press release stated baldly that “[r]umors and speculation that there are major new findings from the mission at this early stage are incorrect.  The news conference will be an update about first use of the rover’s full array of analytical instruments to investigate a drift of sandy soil. One class of substances Curiosity is checking for is organic compounds — carbon-containing chemicals that can be ingredients for life. At this point in the mission, the instruments on the rover have not detected any definitive evidence of Martian organics.”

Audio and visuals from the 3 December NASA/AGU press conference will be broadcast live on USTREAM.  The text of today’s no-fun bubble-bursting press release from the wet blanket brigade over at NASA is available here.

So tell everyone to put their tinfoil hats back into storage – “little green men” have not been discovered on Mars.  And the religious leaders of the world can breathe a big sigh of relief – for now.  Life has not been discovered on another planet, utterly destroying thousands of years of mythologizing “the uniqueness of God’s creation here on Earth”.



2 responses to “SPOILER ALERT! NASA Squashes Rumors of Impending Announcement of Major Discovery on Mars

    • Chelsea:
      From what we have read, it appears that they have found inconclusive evidence of organic molecules in the fine soil the Curiosity rover examined this past month. There may be some members of the scientific team who believe that they have found evidence of organic life on Mars; however, since the results being reported were the result of essentially a single examination of a small sample of soil from a single location, the Curiosity team is unwilling to make such a grandiose claim as “the discovery of evidence of life on Mars” based on such preliminary and isolated sample sizes and experimental results.

      Private websites like the one you cited (Ficksitall Revolution at http://ficksitall.blogspot.com/) are in the business of selling ad space and garnering attention in order to make money for themselves. You’ll notice that they do have ads, via which they get paid every time someone clicks on them; they have used as bait for these ads a series of articles about some of the most popular scientific and pseudoscientific subjects known to man: the “Mayan Apocalypse” hoax; the “faking” of the Apollo Moon landings, etc.; it’s not a website dedicated to the pursuit of accurate knowledge – they’re in pursuit of your eyeballs in order to obtain a small portion of the ad revenue available via the Internet.

      When the NASA team decides that the evidence they have amassed warrants a public announcement of the magnitude of definitive proof that life once existed – or currently exists – on Mars, we believe that you can be reasonably certain that they will not shy away from the spotlight and the tremendous prestige of being the first to make such a human-history-changing announcement. If the NASA or US government leadership were to attempt to censor such a monumental announcement, we believe that dissenting scientists would quickly break the information embargo and come forward on their own with the announcement, even if it meant certain career death. And don’t let the conspiracy nuts convince you that there is a major “coverup” going on at NASA – which the tinfoil-hat crowd will inevitably start doing in… five, four, three, two…

      By the way: the actual NASA article about the very first soil sample analysis ever undertaken on Mars – or any other planet – is available at http://mars.jpl.nasa.gov/msl/news/whatsnew/index.cfm?FuseAction=ShowNews&NewsID=1399. We’ll read up on this and perhaps write an article about it in the near future. It is very exciting news and promises much more to come as the Curiosity mission progresses.



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